Nonprofit AF

Exploring the fun and frustrations of nonprofit work

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A Christmas Carol, Updated for Our Times

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[Image description: An illustration of Scrooge, sitting in an armchair in his robes and floppy hat, being visited by the ghost of Jacob Marley, who appears to be shackled with chains and money boxes. Image by Prawny on Pixabay]

Hi everyone, this will be the last post of 2022. I will be back on January 3rd.

Charles Dickens’s novella a Christmas Carol is a timeless classic. It was first published in 1843 and has never gone out of print. But 1843 is nearly 180 years ago. It’s time for us to update the story to be more relevant to our times:

STAVE ONE:

The story opens at a large foundation’s headquarters on Christmas Eve. Ebenezer Scrooge is the president of the foundation’s board of trustees. He is a miser who hates spending money, Christmas, and people in general. Bob Cratchit, Scrooge’s executive assistant, is looking at some documents. “Mr. Scrooge,” he says, “it seems we haven’t met our legal minimum for how much money the foundation has to spend each year. What do you say we give some extra money to a few nonprofits in the area? Look at this one. Tiny Dem. It’s a small organization working to end voter suppression, gerrymandering, and corruption in politics. This is the fifth time they applied to us.”

“Tiny Dem? Bah humbug!” grumbles Scrooge, “that is the most ridiculous name for a nonprofit! And their mission doesn’t align with the foundation’s main priority, which is teaching financial literacy to toddlers. If children learn early, they won’t grow up to be impoverished hornswogglers suckling at the udders of society. No, just put enough money into a Donor-Advised Fund to meet the legal minimum.”

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Gift Guide: 12 amazing gift ideas for your nonprofit staff or grantees!

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[Image description: Assorted wrapped presents, tied up with ribbons, surrounded by round ornaments and pine cones. Image by buzukis on Pixabay]

Hi everyone, just a quick reminder that this week on December 7th, the amazing Sandy Ho and I are having a conversation called “Dismantling the Culture of Professionalism,” part of a series of talks in celebration of the brilliant Alice Wong’s new book, Year of the Tiger: An Activist’s Life. Join us for this fun discussion. I think a few lucky people in the audience will also get Alice’s book for free, which I have read and which fills me with awe, joy, and gratitude, and not just because she uses the Oxford Comma consistently. Register here. ASL/CC will be provided.

It is December, which means that many of us are thinking of gifts for the people in our lives, thanks to the joy of capitalism and consumer culture. Now, if you work in this sector, especially if you are an executive leader, board member, or funder, you may be trying to figure out the best gifts for your staff or grantees. They can be so hard to shop for! That’s why I’ve compiled a list of gifts sure to please even the most discerning of nonprofit professionals:

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18 tips to help you become a kickass writer!

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[Image description: A cat sleeping with their eyes closed and their head resting on a silver laptop. Image by beauty_of_nature on Pixabay]

Hi everyone, before we get started on today’s topic, if you’re free on December 7th at 4pm Pacific Time, please join me and Sandy Ho of Disability Inclusion Fund at Borealis Philanthropy, for a conversation called “Dismantling the Culture of Professionalism,” sponsored by the Longmore institute on Disability. This is a series of conversations sparked by Alice Wong’s brilliant and hilarious new book, Year of the Tiger. It is FREE, and ASL and captions will be provided. We will talk about how the concept of professionalism plays out in work culture, hiring processes, philanthropy, communications, etc. It’ll be informal, Sandy and I will be cussing, and at least one of us will be dressed in a unicorn onesie, you have been warned. Register here.

People often ask me for advice on writing. (No one ever asks me for my skincare routine, which is understandable, but hurtful). First of all, you don’t need to make writing your main form of communication if writing is not your thing. There are others, possibly more enjoyable and effective ways for you to get your ideas out into the world. Videos, for example. Or Vietnamese water puppetry. I always say we don’t have enough Vietnamese water puppetry in our sector. 

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20 Nonprofit Dad Jokes to Brighten (or Possibly Ruin) Your Day

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[Two brown mountain goats peeking over a rocky ridge. There’s a larger adult goat staring at the camera and a cute little baby goat looking off to the side. Image by Dušan veverkolog on Unsplash]

I got feedback earlier that Nonprofit AF has gotten a bit too serious over the past few years. You’re right, this blog needs more humor! And what is the highest form of humor? Dad jokes! I hope you enjoy these below. Contribute your own in the comment section or go on twitter with the hashtag #NonprofitDadJokes and add to the fun before Twitter collapses.

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10 terrifying tales set in nonprofit and philanthropy guaranteed to give you shivers

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[Image description: Three jack-o-lantern pumpkins with menacing faces, one directly facing the camera. Image by Vladvictoria on Pixabay.]

Happy Halloween everyone! Below are the 10 winners of the Nonprofit AF Scary Story Contest 2022. Thank you to the dozens of colleagues who sent in entries. I read them all under a blanket with a flashlight, shivering with mounting fear and dread as if I was creating a budget using a funder’s budget format set in Word. It was a very difficult task to choose the 10 winners. We have some talented writers (and at least one amazing actor, as you’ll see in a video below) in our sector. These stories won based on creativity, scariness, and originality. Understandably, many colleagues asked to remain anonymous. I did very little editing, except to add Oxford Commas. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did!

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